


Inertia Creeps

by koanju (verstehen)



Category: Stargate: Atlantis
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2005-07-30
Updated: 2005-07-30
Packaged: 2017-10-17 16:02:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,646
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/178535
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/verstehen/pseuds/koanju
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>All he'd wanted was a vacation, but life on Atlantis was never quite that simple. [Sheppard, Zelenka] Co-written with Saeva.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Inertia Creeps

"Damn it!" John Sheppard cursed viciously at the bed roll he'd tripped over for the third time in the process of trying to set up a tent.

It was just his luck that after a careful Jumper survey of the area to make sure that there were no Wraith, Genii, or T-Rexes involved in the make-up of this planet, they'd chosen a mission time that dropped them off in the middle of the planet's nightfall. Even that normally wouldn't be an issue though because he'd have the Jumper, the lights of the Jumper, and no need to set up a damn tent in the first place. The difference was that, today, it'd been decided that Doc Beckett needed practice with the Jumper more than John needed him not to take it -- his own stupid order, he reminded himself as he clenched the end of the flashlight in his teeth -- and so off it was at a site a good three clicks away, further into the wooded area of the planet.

Fact was, this whole damn mission was his fault, stubborn tent and all, as he'd been the one to go to Elizabeth with his bright idea in the first place.

 _John smiled at one of the new lieutenants he'd picked out from the files as she stared nervously around the gateroom for what was maybe the second time -- her first being her arrival, where they'd all been swiftly shuffled in for processing and needle-time with the docs -- and she gave him a weak smile back as he passed her in the open area on the way up the steps to Elizabeth's office. They'd been home, back on Atlantis, for all of two days and already he was itching to get back in on the action, an idea he had every intention of backing up with a plan. A very well thought-out plan that Elizabeth was sure to agree with._

"Oh, for -- Ow!" he growled at the tent stake, hissing out a breath at the pain around where it'd impacted while flying from where he'd grounded it to two feet on his other side.

And all through it, Zelenka was sitting next to the fire a few feet away stirring whatever canned soup he had picked for dinner. And snickering. Loudly. And not offering to help, not even to hold up the two other flashlights they had. It was really starting to piss John off and he was tempted to just say to hell with the tent and go sleep on the beach, where the cool air was off-setting some of this heat. They'd scanned for sea monsters already and there wasn't anything close to the shore bigger than your average dolphin so he felt pretty confident if he went to sleep there he wouldn't wake up with something trying to eat his leg. Assuming Zelenka wasn't a vampire or cannibal.

"Enjoying the show?" he snapped, finally managing to get the poles threaded into the tent.

"Is very amusing, yes," Zelenka agreed, the motion of his hand not faltering for a second as he grinned over at where John was shoving the tent together. "Though does not seem very successful, no?"

"It's been a long time since I had to put up a tent in the dark. You realize you're supposed to be learning this too, right, Doc?" And that was how John knew he needed a vacation bad; he was starting to sound more than a little like Rodney. But some surfing out on the ocean, some hiking, maybe even a little tree-climbing if he was feeling like a kid again and he'd be right as rain.

"I would prefer to put tent up during morning, when there is light, Lieutenant Colonel," the other man replied easily, waving his hand at the half-done tent. "Is quite warm and no rain, yes, so what is hurry?"

His stomach flipped a little at the address. Lieutenant Colonel; it was something he still could barely believe. He dropped the pole and fabric onto the ground to go get the sleeping bags for them both, and he explained, "The hurry is that you might have to do it in the dark."

At least, that had been the plan.

 _"Remember what happened, Elizabeth. Even with the shield up now, we need to make sure everyone is prepared in case we're dumped onto some planet. And this would be the perfect chance to scout alpha and beta sites."_ _John grinned at her, grabbing her cup and refilling it with coffee. Not quite a bribe, but it was close._

 _"That's true, John. It would also foster closer ties between new members of the expedition and the older ones, as well as between the military and science contingents. Still --"_

 _He cut her off before she could get the rest of that but in. "Exactly! It's a good plan."_

Hopefully Riceman was having more luck with Beckett than John was having here with Zelenka, he thought as he grabbed the bags out of their packs and tossed one over at the smirking scientist, who surprisingly caught it with ease.

At his look, Zelenka rolled his eyes back in his head and said, "Am used to Rodney, who throws much heavier things."

And John had some of the bruises to prove it, too. "I'm going to go to the beach then, if you don't need me. Keep your radio open and don't go wandering off into the woods alone: I'm not up for a rescue from a gingerbread house."

"They did not go wandering, were tricked by evil step-mother and bad father," Zelenka snorted. "Man does not even know fairytales."

"I know fairytales," he muttered. "Red Riding Hood, The Three Bears, all that."

"You will wait until eating is finished, yes? Then we go together. Beach sounds nice, so long as we avoid water." Zelenka looked down at the soup and pulled the pan out of the fire. "Is ready. I cannot swim."

John stopped in the middle of reaching for his own cup-bowl combination from his pack and turned to stare over his shoulder at the scientist for a long minute before he completed the action. Soup first, which he hadn't even realized Zelenka had smuggled into the gear from Atlantis's new supply of real food, then freaking out over the fact they had a very necessary part in the running of their _floating_ city unable to swim.

"Is funny, I know, in water city with flooding and the ocean," Zelenka waved the pot at him and John smelled... potatoes. And cheese. And celery. And his stomach growled in response. "Small accident on boat, when I was young," he continued, pouring some of the soup into the cup-bowl John held out.

"Great. So, we're talking phobia?" Because that was bad. The sort of complicated bad that made Zelenka, big brain or not, a liability when it came to rescue operations and emergencies in a 'water city'.

"Have no phobia of water, otherwise I would never bathe. I do not smell, do I?" He grinned and poured the rest of soup into his own cup. An actual thermos. Obviously he'd packed a few things beyond what had been on John's list.

Then John, with the exception of a few recreational items, had been packing as if this had been part of an emergency evacuation and not a beach holiday, so he was bound to have a few less comforts. "Hey. I don't have a problem with ants, but cockroaches bug me the fuck out, so there's a difference between little amounts and big, crawling, hard to kill --" He shuddered, cutting himself off. "Either way, Doc, looks like we've got a project for the next few days."

Zelenka sipped his soup and eyed John over the fire and the rims of his glasses. "An understandable phobia. You were lucky. No, is wrong. All of Atlantis was lucky." John noticed that wasn't an agreement to learn how to swim.

"I had a giant bug attach itself to the side of my neck and try to suck the life out of me," he pointed out as he took a hungry sip of his soup and noticed how real it tasted. After a year of MREs and Athosian food that never exactly tasted like it seemed to smell, having this on a mission was heaven.

"Yes, and you survived. That is lucky part for all of us." He nodded toward the soup and pushed his glasses up his nose. "Is good, yes?"

"It's good," John agreed, but he wasn't going to let that distract him from his point. "Thing is, I survived and I went back out on missions, because I was needed out there. And you're needed on Atlantis, which would sort of be screwed if you drowned because you were working alone and something happened that put you in the water where you couldn't swim."

"I am not stupid, no matter what Rodney may say, Major. No, Colonel. I am sorry, rank is very important. I am not going into spaces where swimming is required." He sniffed the soup and sighed with a contented sound in the back of his throat. "Is freeze dried. Had Rodney contact my mother for it."

It was weird hearing Zelenka, who had to be around John's age, talk about contacting his mother, but a lot of the scientists were like that. Doc Beckett had spent a week in Scotland with his mother during the reviewing process, and even invited John along though he couldn't take the invitation. He had other, more pressing and painful, things scheduled.

With a shrug of his shoulders he shook the thoughts away and sighed, glancing over at where Zelenka was contently drinking his soup. "Tomorrow we start teaching you how to swim."

See, this was exactly the sort of thing he'd been telling Elizabeth about.

Zelenka sighed. "This will not go well," he advised. "Not well at all. I am regretting letting you have my mother's soup now. I do not learn to swim. Anything else you wish to teach, I am happy to be student. We, in Atlantis, owe you that. I do not owe you swimming."

It was interesting. Interesting the way Zelenka thought he owed John, even down to the exact *level* of what he thought he owed.

"You don't owe me anything," he told the other man seriously, setting the tin of soup down carefully next to him as he looked over at Zelenka's shadowed frame. "It's what I signed up for. It's my job." Nobody owed him anything for doing his job.

"Is not your job, Colonel. You job is not to die for us. You cannot protect us if you are dead. Yet, many times, you fly into certain death. Is amazing you are alive. What is the word? Miracle. Yes, miracle. You have gift." Zelenka set his own cup aside and it made a quiet thud against the rock he was setting it on.

With an absent thud John smacked his hand against his thigh and sighed, trying to figure out how to put it and wondering if someone who didn't sign up for the service would get it. "My job is to protect the mission and the city even no matter what, Doctor. No matter what it takes, or what I have to risk personally. I signed on that and swore an oath to it too. Sometimes that means flying into certain death and hoping you get lucky."

"And sometimes it means waiting the minute it takes for us to do our job so you don't have to, yes?" Zelenka shook his head and clicked his tongue between his teeth. "How should we put fire out?"

He glanced down at the dirt and slowly brought his eyes back up, grinning a little despite the sharpness of Zelenka's comment. The jab wasn't fair, because he did wait, sometimes until it was almost too late to do anything. He waited a lot, and he didn't push, and that was part of the problem now, part of what Caldwell and some of the others thought he might be doing wrong.

 _"Still, John... This would be difficult to organize and we may not want to risk taking people out to unexplored planets. How about the mainland instead?"_

 _He groaned, plopping down in the chair across from her with a sigh. "We know they -- everyone -- can handle the mainland and the Athosians, Elizabeth, but we don't have a set group of people that can afford to leave and another group that can afford to always be here. Not with the Wraith hovering over our shoulders like the life-sucking bugs they are. Coddling them's not going to do any good, is it?"_

 __Maybe that was what he was doing here, rushing things, pushing when there wasn't any need. On the other hand, coddling Zelenka, letting him worm out of learning how to swim when it was an essential skill living in the middle of an _ocean_ , wouldn't help. "I'm getting better about that."

"Yes, you are. No longer do you endanger everyone, now just endanger yourself. Is a step up. Small one, of course."

With a click John snapped his mouth shut on the retort he had brimming on the edge of his tongue and he started to douse the fire with sand quickly. The soup, half-forgotten at his feet, nearly toppled over in the process but he saved it, setting it well out of range so that he wouldn't be eating sand as he continued with his task.

This wasn't like Rodney and the difference burned, making his jaw ache from clenching. When Rodney said things like that it wasn't about as important as half of what else he said, which meant not really important at all except to help the hyperactive and sensitive -- in the health sense -- man blow off a little steam. The same didn't hold true for Zelenka.

Zelenka eyed what he was doing and then started to pack up the two open bags nearby. "I am sorry, I have said too much. I do not have liberty Rodney has."

This was just great and John sighed, dropping back down on the dirt ground for a minute while he watched the dying embers of the fire. "No. It's just -- Rodney doesn't mean that shit, when he says that. That's the difference."

John caught a flash of teeth in the dark before Zelenka turned on a flashlight. "Rodney means every word. He just stops meaning it quickly after. Easily distracted. You save my life, yes? I worry now. Is an unexpected consequence. To beach?" He picked up his bags and shouldered them, still holding the flashlight. John had been a little surprised, on the walk out here, that Zelenka hadn't stumbled or faltered once from the weight.

It meant that the scientist, who was an engineer more than the applied mathematician that John had believed for months there until a quick comment by Rodney had corrected his misconception, was stronger than his small, frail-looking frame gave him credit for, which was a good sign in any case. He'd long since learned not to underestimate the scientists, from his experiences at McMurdo, where tough and stubborn geologists and meterologists were perfectly happy to pretend the cold didn't exist if it meant getting the sort of readings their research needed. John would easily admit he'd seen more than one soldier with less perservance than even the laziest scientist down in the Antarctic.

Most of the group here, in Atlantis, put the industrious ones at McMurdo to shame. "We go," he agreed, looking up at the sky briefly. The planet was, at least according to the Jumper scans, uninhabited, but it didn't really stop him from wondering about what all the stars were called.

That was one of the weirdest things for him, to fly in unfamiliar skies, in places with more suns and moons and stars that were in the wrong places. He'd almost asked Rodney once where Earth's sun was in the sky but he'd chickened out. John had worried too much that the answer would be "It's not. We're too far away to see the light." So now, when he ended up on a planet with a clear night sky, he tried to compare the position of the stars to those at Atlantis and find the star he'd named Earth's sun, no matter how off he probably was. Tonight he'd do it later, after Doctor Zelenka was tucked into a bed roll fast asleep and he had some time to himself to be an idiot.

"Is that one," Zelenka said suddenly. John looked next to him, at the shorter man, to see him pointing up and to the western part of the sky, the light from his flashlight illuminating his finger. "Atlantis. Home. That is what you look for?"

'Not exactly,' he started to say but then he stopped, staring at the expanse of sky in the west and where the other man's finger was pointing. "Yeah. Home. That's what I'm looking for," John agreed after a minute, as he decided that maybe knowing where home was was better than knowing where Earth might be.

The doc smiled and put his arm back down, holding the flashlight out in front of him. "There is no dot of light to see, of course, except for sun. But that is an approximation based on our position and Atlantis's sun. Close enough to get home to, I think."

"In a few days we can take the easy way home, I think," he replied, smiling a little as he settled his own flashlight down on the overgrown path leading to the beach. There'd been people here, but not for a long time if the vegetation said anything, and part of him wondered what'd happened to them but he didn't voice that either. "Is that, uh, what you think of Atlantis as? Home?"

"I love Prague. Is beautiful city, old city. My family has been there for years. Atlantis is different than Prague." Zelenka went quiet for a few moments and John curbed his instinct to ask 'And?'. Instead he waited, listening to Zelenka's breathing, the sound of the leaves and sand crunching under their feet and the rustle of the wind through the trees. "Prague is city. Atlantis is the people," Zelenka said finally. "Is a very bad explanation. I do not have the English."

"No, no, I get it." He smiled back at the other man over his shoulder before turning to the path again. "Antartica, it was like that for me. It was... I loved it. It was supposed to be a punishment, but it was amazing. Atlantis is different." Atlantis meant not getting to fly like he used to. It meant more responsibilities, ones he wasn't sure he could handle, it meant people depending on him.

"I am sorry, then, for you. Why did you come back?"

He grinned, shrugging off the loss of Antarctica because it was too late to go back there now, and said, "I got promoted."

That made the other man laugh. "Is very small reward for doing very big job. You would miss us too, I think."

"I don't know. Get a whole new pin on my uniform and everything. It's pretty cool."

"So easily pleased." There was that tsking sound again as they walked but a quick glance over saw Zelenka still smiling. "I can think of things I want more than a pin."

For a second he was tempted to say that it was more than a pin but he bit his lip on the words, figuring that it wouldn't be understood. He didn't have the English for it, even if the Czech man did.

"Though perhaps I am wrong. I was very pleased with little piece of paper once too," Zelenka continued, surprising him.

He started to open his mouth, then stopped, then said: "The one saying you'd been past all the tests to get your doctorate?"

"Yes. My parents were --" Zelenka looked over at him quickly, appraisingly. "Not communists. Was a problem before the independence."

"Yeah." It was what he said because he didn't have anything else to say to that, except it was stupid, and it shouldn't have been a problem, and everything else that was already obvious. Instead, he wound his way down towards the beach, keeping a careful ear out for his companion. "I was pretty excited over that little piece of paper too."

Zelenka stopped dead in his tracks and stared. He swallowed. "You are very devious."

John frowned, honestly confused at what he was supposedly so devious about. He might have felt better about being called it if he knew why, at least. "Huh?"

"Does Rodney know? No, of course Rodney does not know. If he knew, he would be yelling about waste all day and night. Also pining that you are not blonde." He shook his head and started walking again, steps getting longer and heavier as he hurried to keep up. "You hide like, like, small animal, changes colors? What is word. Chameleon?"

Letting himself slid down into a slower pace so that the shorter legged man wouldn't have to struggle to keep up, John effected the best half-shrug he could with the gear weighing him down. "That's the word you're looking for, I think, but..." He frowned. "It just never came up. I don't think Rodney knows."

"What is your degree? Engineering? Aviation?" Zelenka asked, curious as he finally caught up. "Thank you."

He managed a shrug that he thought looked pretty casual and grinned over at the scientist. "I like planes and you've got to get a degree if you want to get anywhere in the Air Force so I figured why not. It's not like I've devoted my life to it like anyone on Atlantis has, it was just something to do that looked good on my record." The sort of thing that got him a promotion three years early despite his tendency to circumvent orders he thought didn't work.

"Necessary, perhaps, but not doctorate, yes? Is very impressive. Also explains why you tolerate Rodney better than most. His coloring is different than yours, but still coloring." Zelenka did sound impressed. "You are one of us. Is that," he pointed to a spot about fifty yards away toward the top of the beach. "Suitable?"

"Actually, in the Jumper I scoped out this perfect little cove just about a quarter mile up. It has a nice, shallow pool for wading and there's surf nearby." The grin loosened as he thought of the little spot of paradise he'd searched out when doing basic scans in the Jumper, but the smile dampened when he realized that it was a little far away from the rest of their camp for someone not used to walking. "Unless you think you're gonna have trouble with the walk?"

"You planned holiday. You are very slick. Next time warn me; I will plan holiday too." Zelenka grinned at him and readjusted the bags he was carrying, wearing one as a proper backpack and loosening the left strap on the other so he could pull it over his head. "You are tall, do not walk so fast. I will manage."

 _"No, of course it isn't, but don't you think that's being a little rough on them?" she asked, frowning at him over the tips of her fingertips where she had her hand waving in front of her face._

 _It was exactly the opening he'd been looking for and he grinned. "Nah. 'Cause I figure we scout the planets, make sure they're nice and safe, and then sort of coach it as a vacation. Hell, Teyla might even get Rodney to sleep if he gets taken away from all his new toys."_

 _Elizabeth's eyebrow raised. "Teyla?"_

 _"Yeah. I made a list. One soldier to one scientist, and making sure that, say, Miller didn't get paired with Dr. Washburne because then we'd have starving to death or something over a long weekend. First up's me and Zelenka, Doc Beckett and Lt. Riceman. She's got more survival training than half the Marines on this city and I figure that since the doc's been taking a more active role with going off-world lately it was time to get him to cover the basics." It didn't hurt Riceman was one of the most patient people John had ever met, which made her twice as patient as even the most patient person on Atlantis. They weren't a group known for patience._

 _"It sounds like you've got this all planned out."_

 _John grinned. "I'm gonna take one of the surfboards if that's all right with you."_

"Why do you think *we* got the beach?" he replied with an equally wide grin, making sure to keep his steps nice, small, and even. It wasn't the first time he had to slow down because of other members of the team, even if this was just a team of two. "Anyway, what'd you think this was?" This refering to the awkward, very much surfboard shaped bag in his left hand. It'd been a bitch convincing Elizabeth that surfboards should be included in the requisitioned recreational equipment they'd brought back from Earth but, come on! Floating city!

"I do not know. What is it?" Zelenka looked up at him curiously, not paying attention to the ground and nearly tripped and fell on a branch. John caught his arm and steadied him quickly before the scientist went down.

He still had his hand on the other man's arm when he said, "It's a surfboard. For surfing. Not as good as ferris wheels but I couldn't convince Elizabeth to let me build one on Atlantis."

"Surfing. That is the thing, on the waves?" It might have been John's imagination but he thought the other man looked a little green.

It could have just been the flashlights.

He nodded against the shine of Zelenka's flashlight and, after a moment, released the other man's arm, sliding his hand around to the back instead to keep steadying there without quite touching. The path was growing rockier, twisted with sand weeds, and the last thing they needed first day of their scouting mission was a twisted ankle.

He was given a quick grateful look before Zelenka trained his gaze back down on the ground, choosing his steps carefully. "You lived near water, yes? To learn?"

"Some of the time. It was enough, I guess, to give me the taste for it," he offered, watching the path for both of them himself.

This place actually reminded him of what home had been when he was fourteen but he didn't add that and wouldn't have even if he thought Zelenka might care. Maybe he might have told Rodney but then again maybe not.

"Before Atlantis, before Antarctica, I have only seen ocean twice. I cannot imagine living by it, even now. Strange, no?"

It *was* strange, but no more strange than any number of things John had seen and done here in the Pegasus galaxy. He was the man who'd released two bombs at the possible expense of his own life. Who was he to talk about people and their phobias?

"Guess we all got our quirks," he said finally, smiling softly in the dim light as he watched out for any possible obstacles they might get tripped over. Another part of his mind was keeping an eye on their surroundings, not trusting the supposed uninhabitedness of this planet to Jumper scans and a brief survey in the air.

"We do," Zelenka said quietly and then said no more, letting them walk in silence through the increasingly difficult terrain. It wasn't bad, exactly, just uneven and rocky and covered with brush. Nothing either one of them couldn't handle in daytime.

The fact was that spending eighteen days cooped up on a too small spaceship with a crew full of scientists and one very naked, very not human looking alien had sort of made him skittish about what they might find here, on different planets. For all they knew there was a sentient, hostile alien race creeping around out here that they'd mistake for Golden Retrievers or jackrabbits when the time came down to it. It made his skin crawl when he let himself think about the idea too much.

It was so stupid too. It was like being afraid of the ferris wheel in the movie _1941_ when it was hit and rolled off the pier. Just because it might happen didn't mean it would and John knew, bone deep, that going into this with the same sort of antagonism that Sumner and Bates had displayed to Teyla and the Athosians when they'd first met wouldn't make them any friends, only enemies.

But the reality that these were _aliens,_ he was on an alien planet, was finally starting to sink in and all it took was a cranky naked advanced alien to do it. Maybe the Asgard had advanced beyond the need for clothes. Come to think of it, the Ancients didn't actually have real bodies, did they? They didn't really need clothes either. Though as far as he knew when they looked, well, normal they also wore clothes. At least, he thought Rodney would have mentioned if it was custom for Ancients to go prancing around naked when he was bitching about everything else Chaya did weird.

Not that John had noticed anything weird. She'd seemed pretty cool to him. Of course the only alien beings they'd run across he hadn't pretty much got along with on sight were the Wraith and that damned Wraith bug -- not that he'd actually really *seen* the bug. Even the little firefly things hadn't been all that bad or even all that alien. They were *fireflies.*

"Colonel?" Zelenka asked and John felt a touch on his arm. Not a hand, a bag. Of course the other man didn't have a free hand to touch with. "Is everything all right? We are at beach now."

He winced, shaking his head to clear it as much as anything, and congratulated himself on really paying attention there. One of these days this wandering off into his own thoughts was going to get someone killed, he thought to himself in disgust, but he nodded at the scientist with a little sigh. "Yeah. Sorry. Guess I'm a little tired. It's been a long... year."

"Has been long life," Zelenka agreed, sighing. "Is this cove you scouted? Is very nice." He looked around, dropping the bags he was carrying into the sand and eyed the water rolling in dubiously.

"Just up ahead," he said, jabbing towards the far end of the inlet awkwardly with the hand that held the surf board. There stood a small, though comfortable enough to walk around in, rock structure that would make the perfect make-shift tent for their little camping excursion tonight. "I figure it's got cover and it's shallow enough that if the Pegasus Galaxy has something like bats we won't learn about it tonight."

"Ah, yes." Zelenka nodded quickly and picked his bags back up. "We go, unpack, sleep. Yes?"

"Best suggestion I heard all night," he agreed, shooting the other man a grin as they set out down the slight downslope of the dunes protecting the inlet. When Zelenka skitted against the sand, nearly dropping himself in the process, John let go of his own bags to get him steadied and then took the laptop bag and bedding gear he was holding with a sheepish smile. "First step's the worst."

Zelenka inhaled deeply and pulled away. "Thank you, Colonel. Is good you are here." Taking a few experimental steps, Zelenka nodded to himself. "I take bags again now, please." He held out his hands.

But John shrugged off the attempts to take the bags, nodding his head towards the rocks at the end. "You go ahead and keep your eyes out. This is gonna take me a couple of trips over that sand anyway, it's pretty deep."

"Is not your job to be..." Even in the dim light from the moons off the water and the flashlight Zelenka was still carrying, John could see him frowning. "To be servant. No matter how Rodney treats you. Let me."

He quirked up an eyebrow, shouldering one of the bags he was carrying as he tried to decide what to do with the laptop. The things could withstand a lot, but sand and salt water weren't included, which meant he'd have to be careful with it. "You've never seen Basic," he said, letting his eyes roll. "I'm trained to carry things for people smarter than me. It's in the job description. Right next to 'shoots things real good'."

The laptop bag was snatched right off the ground in front of him with an exasperated grunt. "You are smart as anyone on Atlantis. Please do not belittle my knowledge and yours by pretending, Colonel. Makes me very angry. I am not Rodney. I do not need to subdue anyone to make self feel better." That blow delivered, Zelenka turned and started making his wobbly way over the loose sand.

John winced again but he didn't hurry to catch up or to explain himself when he managed to get the bed gear and his other stuff over to where Zelenka was waiting in front of the cave-like thing. In fact, he stayed silent all the way through the unpacking, dodging annoyed glares from one apparently very pissed Czech and amusing himself by translating the curses the other man kept muttering through the process. Zelenka had a *very* dirty mouth when it came to animals and what they tended to leave behind. But he'd grabbed the bedrolls and the food supplies and was setting up camp so he figured he shouldn't complain.

It'd tip off the man that John knew what he was saying anyway. He was sure that the Czech might appreciate someone to talk to in his own language but John just wasn't ready to give up that advantage yet.

"Is done. We sleep. You make breakfast." He sounded grumpy as he stretched out on his bedroll which, John noticed, was "coincidentally" placed as far from the water as he could get it.

"Sure, sounds good," he replied quietly. It was fair, after Zelenka making dinner for the both of them, and more or less setting up camp, and he'd be up anyway for awhile. "Uh," he started the next sentence and then shut up, deciding not to worry about it. He'd take watch and then set up some of the gear he'd trudged along with him from the camp to alert him the second anything out of the ordinary came within shooting distance.

"Yes, Colonel?" Zelenka asked anyway, turning toward where John was hunched. "You wish to apologize, yes?"

Riiight, he thought, his head snapping up in surprise. That hadn't exactly been what he was thinking. "I was wondering if you wanted to take a watch or not."

"Watch what?" He sounded honestly confused by the question.

John snorted a little, then grinned, shaking his head. 'Watch what.' Zelenka was worse than Rodney with the 'That means quiet, right?' questions about the hand signals, though he knew at least some of that was fucking with Major Lorne's head because Rodney damn well knew the signal for 'Shut the hell up now, Rodney, before you get us shot.' "Well, that's a good question. All goes well the only thing to watch would be the waves," he said with a grin. "It's a term. A security watch when your teammates are sleeping so that they aren't caught by then enemy when their asses are tucked in bed."

"Ah, yes. I see. I do not have weapon to use but I will take watch," Zelenka said easily. "Sensors can be fooled. We should work at that, Colonel, when back at Atlantis. Expand sensor arrays in Jumpers. Is good plan."

"Yeah, good plan. But, uh, you know how to use a handgun, right? I'm pretty sure I remember Elizabeth-- " He stopped because one too many rants from Doc Beckett had made him wary of using the word 'order' around civilians, and then supplied 'suggested' instead. "Suggested that everyone get comfortable with basic sidearm use."

"I did not take ordered training. No need. I said my parents were not Communists, yes? I know how to use gun." He sighed and John watched him roll onto his back and pull the glasses of his face, folding them up and tucking them into a pocket of one of the nearby laptop bags. "I dislike it but I know it."

He almost asked who liked it but then his mind flickered across the fresh wound that was Ford and he stopped, nodding. "You can use my sidearm when you take watch," was what he said instead, dropping down into the sand to watch the entrance of the cave. It was going to be a long, boring night.

"If you are bored, take my laptop. File is named atlantisw.exe. Is computer game I program in spare time. Play and give me critique and bugs in morning." He pushed the laptop bag toward John though it didn't move far against the sand. "You may be dumbest smart person I know, but I thank you for effort."

"The point of watch is sort of... to watch," he pointed out, but he was grateful for the thought anyway, though he knew he wouldn't use the laptop. It had limited battery power and even with the extras he knew Doctor Zelenka was packing he didn't want to drain anything. "Thanks."

"You are good enough to multitask, I think." And now he was *definitely* being teased. "When will you wake me?"

This was a question he was sort of hoping to avoid because he knew he didn't want to deal with a cranky scientist on only four hours of sleep if they split the shift evenly. "Well, usually there's four of us here. So, I figure I'll give you a few hours, then you can take watch. Then we'll rely on the sensors so that we get some actual sleep. Sound good?"

"Hmm," Zelenka said, sounding half asleep already. "Yes, please. Coffee grounds in laptop bag too, please."

John's eyebrows went up and he wondered not only where Zelenka had managed to hide his stash but also why he didn't just want coffee.

It was possible he didn't want to know and since the other man's breathing had evened out into sleep he didn't ask either, just relaxing into the state of awareness he liked to jive in when he was on watch. It was almost a state of rest though not quite as good as sleeping. It'd be enough that when he 'forgot' to wake up Zelenka for his shift he wouldn't miss any of the sleep at least and, if push came to shove, he could always nap during the day tomorrow while the other man was wide awake.

After double-checking Zelenka's shooting.

He might have learned to shoot when he was a kid but that didn't mean he still knew what he was doing. Even Rodney, with all the drills and training John had put him through since they'd come here, still screwed up. John just wasn't going to take the word of a man who might not have touched a gun in twenty years that he could use it. That was something to worry about tomorrow though.

For now he zoned, listening for anything outside of the ordinary wash of the waves and shrill whine of the winds, and kept himself still, like he was mediating. In the morning he'd worry about defense and not drowning and Zelenka's angry words, but not right now.

\- End - 

  



End file.
